Attachment styles in relationships

In short: Attachment theory describes how early experiences with caregivers shape relationship behaviour in adulthood. A distinction is usually made between secure, anxious, avoidant and anxious-avoidant attachment styles.

In more detail: The theory goes back to psychologist John Bowlby and researcher Mary Ainsworth.

In detail

• Secure style: Trust in oneself and others, closeness and autonomy can be combined well.
• Anxious style: Strong need for closeness, fear of losing the relationship.
• Avoidant style: Prefers independence, struggles with emotional closeness.
• Anxious-avoidant style: Desire for closeness alongside fear of it.
• Origin: Often shaped already in early childhood by caregivers’ behaviour.
• Changeability: Attachment styles are not fixed fates and can change through experience and reflection.
• Relationship work: Knowing your own style makes communication in partnerships easier (konfliktmanagement-im-alltag).